get me the hell out of here

Sorry.

I guess I have forgotten that I have an audience that reaches beyond who hears what I have to say first-hand. My apologies.

Having said that I’ve been in a rut for a week or two. I’m not happy, but I’m not sad – I find myself in this ugly void of emotion where I just do what I can to not think about anything. I still refuse to look at pictures of my grandmother, or see my uncle. I want to, I really wish I could be getting on with this but I know at this juncture it would do more bad than good to force it.

My heart is a car wreck.

The better news is how much sun I’ve been getting exposed to, and how much time I’m getting with Thomas, and how Niko’s hard work paid off and he’s now a graduate and academic award winning graphic designer! and how much I missed the simple pleasure of dinner and a movie with good company.

School is alright, I’m taking a police class and learning how I can sleaze my way out of getting arrested. Or at least that’s what I’m trying to learn. I just want to be done, if I could take 9 classes a week I would just to have it be over. I need a rest…I just want to have work as a responsibility.

Work is getting better every month…I really do love it here and am gaining invaluable experience with these folks. I’ve never felt more supported and comfortable with any work group before…they’re like family. I don’t think I can emphasize how much I enjoy my job and how serious I take it. For whatever stories I tell about the flexibility of the job (i.e. playing AOE during downtime) there’s 20 others of situations in which I’m busting my ass. I just don’t bother telling those because, hey, that shit’s boring.

Alright, it’s Friday and I managed to catch Thomas’ coughing virus but that will not stop me from having a great Memorial Day. COOKOUT REVIVAL!!!

Oh, 28 Weeks Later was fucking sick.

So is this.